Go Jump Off a Cliff

I wasn't going to go here yet in my original vision of how I was going to progress the topic of aging, but with Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning Part One starting to get a lot of promotional push, with its 60-yr old star doing that massively impressive but, let's be real, reckless stunt driving a motorcycle off a steep cliff being featured in a lot of that, it just seemed like it was time to talk about what our role in our chosen professions are as we age, and do we get to choose that or is it chosen for us? And do we, like Tom Cruise, have to push some envelopes to stay relevant?

Paramount Pictures

Tom Cruise is a little bit younger than me, but not that much. And he's doing these crazy huge stunts that one would wonder at his sanity even if he were half the age and even if stuntman was his occupation, not lead actor, so I've been pondering what exactly is going on in that brain of his. What's he trying to prove and to whom? Don't get me wrong: I'll go to the movie. In Imax. Hopefully on opening weekend. That franchise is full of visually stunning shots and stunts; who even cares what the plot is (which, seriously...I've seen them all and can barely tell you what really went on in any of them, but I remember all the visuals). But while I sit there with my popcorn I'll wonder why he's pushing himself further and further out there with the lengths he'll go to on screen. What's odd is I saw a photo with him and his two stunt doubles. Who are both eerily similar to him in appearance. Creepy almost. Right? It's not just me? So he's got these two guys at his disposal who almost looked like they were cloned, so why not let them do the big leap?

Reddit Pop Culture Chat

Anyway, shaking off how bizarrely alike they all look, this could morph into a two-prong ponder actually:

First, there's the Tom Cruise "I'm going to push all rational limits to (potentially) show all of you - but mostly myself - that I've still got 'it'."  Because while I threw the "potentially" in there to cover myself in case he's got another agenda altogether, we all know Hollywood's a young person's game, and while that might be changing to be more inclusive, I saw just enough of The Idol to know it's still generally true. And Hollywood is a heightened, glitzy reflection in many ways of society. It's easy to dismiss us as we age. Therefore, I'm willing to bet he's fighting a war on agism. whether it's real or in his own mind.

Then there's the "we really need to take the keys from grandma" scenario where someone actually does reach a limit to what they are capable of, physically or mentally, but refuses to concede to it.

In my mind, they're two separate situations. And we don't need to talk about the latter situation yet. I am not there personally, although I'll admit I might be slower or it might be tougher to do some things I once did without a second thought. I'm still able to drive.  I'm still able to mow the lawn (takes a while, but then again it's on a slope, so cut me some slack). I can sling a 50 lb bag of dog food but it seems to have gained a few pounds over the years. I ride my Peloton five days a week. I get my steps in.  As a matter of fact I'll go ahead and declare myself in better shape than I was 20 years ago, but that is because I'm more or less doing the opposite of Tom Cruise when it comes to my career...I don't want to prove anything to anyone about what I'm capable of.  I just want to finally live a work-life balance which allows me time to get up from this desk for more than getting a precious few hours of sleep.  I've done the professional version of jumping a motorcycle off a cliff in the past and my family paid a hefty price for that.  I am tired, but it's not because of my age. Like Indiana Jones famously said, "...it's the mileage."

I'm more than willing to do my job and try to do it well. What I don't want to do is stay at the office for 36-straight hours, as I once did, catching a couple of hours of sleep on the very, very hard office floor.  I'm not sure I did anyone any favors when I did stunts like that actually. I want to work smarter not harder. (Notice I said I "want" to - not ready to claim I do so.)

So okay fine, right? Tom Cruise wants to risk life and limb. I don't.  Vive la difference, bon? Well that's where I worry, and what I'm truly pondering when I spend brain cells wondering at that stunt: is it okay? Or do each of us "over a certain age" carry the burden of every other older worker to prove all of us belong and can contribute in the workplace?

I spent a lot of my younger years working under the shadow of my father who came of age in the Depression and prized and taught the value of hard work. He was always acting as though we were one step away from financial disaster. For a while in our lives, I think that might have been true, but he managed to steer us through it intact, so I learned the lesson that he was right: a career is a duel to the death. You're fighting against others who want your place, and you're fighting against the wolves at the door.  The one who works hardest prevails.  Hard work is what you do to protect your family. I thought that was right at the time.

I also always felt I carried the weight of expectations from those women who battled to open doors for my generation. All the "bra burners" who came of age just before me and fought for equal rights for women and equal pay for equal work (which we still don't have). I felt compelled to work hard to show the world those women were right: we are equal, if not often better in many cases, than our male counterparts and deserve to play with the big boys. Even with children in tow. Anyone remember this commercial?

It's no wonder I'm tired: that's a lot of weight to carry around.

Now do I also have to constantly prove myself to be a bit better, able to work a bit longer and press to contribute bigger ideas for the benefit of all my older peers too? 

Because I don't want to frankly. I want to go on a walk with my dog right now. But that's just me.  How do you feel about your place in the work world? Or, if you're retired, did you feel like that was your choice and were you ready?